I know we're not the only ones caught in this struggle, but I get so scared having to go through a financial crisis. I was opening up bills today and they all had the same type of sticker on them. FINAL NOTICE. NEXT STEP COLLECTIONS. Because my not paying you before was totally my choice. Whatever. We're seriously doing the best we can right now. I can see a break coming up, but is it going to be soon enough? Our debt management program will be done in December. Matthew will be done with daycare in November. Those are two huge payments that will be gone each month that can be put toward other things.
My birthday is on Monday. I'm expecting nothing, because, honestly, my birthdays have pretty much always sucked. Growing up, I never got to have birthdays with friends; I only got family birthday parties. When I was 13, I got to have a friend birthday party which my sister chaperoned. It was kind of a cluster fuck. From the time I was 10 until I was 18, my birthday weekends were always race weekends. It was the last race weekend of the season, so my birthday was ignored for racing. My 16th birthday I had a quiet dinner with my dad when I would've loved a huge Sweet 16 party. My 18th birthday I had a procedure similar to a colonoscopy done. My 21st birthday I was home with a little one. My 28th birthday (my golden birthday) I was court ordered into a state mental hospital. My sucky birthdays are the reason I try to make birthdays for other people so special. But I would like a special birthday.
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