There have been good days and there have been bad. My mom's been here, which has been awesome. She came to spend the week and help me out, but she left today and now I'm just all torn up. I came to the realization that she's *old* and she's not going to be around as long as I'd like. My kids aren't going to know her forever. I didn't even think of taking pictures I was so out of it. Who knows when I'm going to see her again?
I didn't go to DBT group on Thursday. I came down with a case of intestinal something or other, which was probably nerves, because as the afternoon wore on, it became much better. I just don't want to go. I don't know why I'm so resistant to going this time. I just don't want to do any of it. I don't want to have to put up with the people that I don't know, I don't want to have to get to know the people, I don't want to accidentally get over-invested in their lives, I don't want to do all the work that gets me tired out, I don't want to come home to a family who doesn't understand how damn exhausting it is to be doing all that work. I just don't want any of it this time around.
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